Horrifying Sounds, Part II of III

Welcome to the next installment of Horrifying Sounds, a review of my favorite spooky, creepy and otherwise unsettling music. Before I get into the list, I want to talk a little bit about why I decided to write about this.

For as long as I can remember I have loved Horror (that's with a capital 'H', bucko). In fact, the first short story I EVER wrote was a little chiller called "The Insulted Devil" about a boy who vanquishes a demon with water from a wash basin. Not bad for a fourth grader, eh?

This obsession extends to ghost stories, books, movies, art, music, video games and so on. But above all else on this pantheon of the macabre, the mysterious, the unexplained, the disturbing, the mischievous and the frightening sits Halloween: a celebration born from centuries-old traditions which, in one form or another, have persisted, like dark seeds stretching curling tendrils through the soil of history.

What's not to love?

Halloween is a big deal to me. Music is a big deal to me. It stands to reason that the two would come together. And they do. Oh, how they do.

So this is why: the motivation is the love of all things Halloween. The practical application? Use this music on October 31st. Play it at your Halloween party. Be THAT house in your neighborhood. Throw open the windows, point the speakers toward the street and have at it. Crank some spooky music. Add to the atmosphere. Or, put on some Saint-Saëns and curl up with your favorite Horror novel.

On to the list...

The Thing Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
Composed and Conducted by Ennio Morricone

I've already confessed to being a John Carpenter fanboy, but at least this time the music is by someone else. Namely, Italian-born composer Ennio Morricone, who is perhaps most well known for his collaboration with director Sergio Leone on films like A Fistful of Dollars and The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. It might seem like quite a stretch to go from Spaghetti Westerns to Horror, but Morricone's vast body of work is a master class in creative versatility including music for film, television and concert. In The Thing, Morricone's orchestral score is a landscape unto itself: every bit as chilling and sparse as the Arctic setting of the film. Strings are the predominant instruments here, running the gamut from classically inspired passages to frenetic, atonal pizzicato more in keeping with avante-garde compositions. The Thing just drips with fear, suspicion and paranoia. Simply put, this score is perfect for both the film and for your front yard on All Hallow's Eve.

In the Mouth of Madness Original Soundtrack Recording
John Carpenter and Jim Lang

Okay, before you roll your eyes, this is the last one from Carpenter. I swear. Well, except to say that Halloween's status as a must own is a foregone conclusion and therefore not mentioned in this list. But you knew that. Right?

Anyway, here's the deal: my humble opinion, this is the last good horror movie John Carpenter made. I don't like saying it, but it's how I feel. All of that aside, In the Mouth of Madness is good haunting music. Just one word of advice: skip tracks 1 & 2. Somewhere along the line, Carpenter got the idea that an "Enter Sandman"-inspired rock tune and a David Gilmour-inspired, noodly, bluesy little guitar vignette would be a good additions to the score. I strongly disagree. Fast forward. Or take them out of your iTunes playlist entirely. In fact, delete them from your library. As for the rest, rock solid. The instrumentation is a little more dense than his previous scores, apparently borrowing a bit from Nine Inch Nails and even grunge, which was still moping strong in '95 when this movie was released. Surprisingly, there are even moments here that sound a bit like Elliot Goldenthal's work on Alien 3 (reviewed in the first installment). Apart from those divergences, the old Carpenter minimalism holds fast.

Lyckantropen Themes
Ulver

Subtitled "Original Soundtrack for the Short Film by Steve Ericsson". First off, get yourself a copy of said film. It's great. Lyckantropen Themes is a an ambient/trip hop score by Norwegian black-metal-turned-experimental musical shapeshifters Ulver. I can't say enough good things about this music or about Ulver, in general. While this may tread a little bit more on the melancholy than the macabre side for some, this is still great dark music. Better still, the subject matter is werewolves, which is near and dear to my heart. Let me also offer this about Ulver: if you can make any sense of their discography whatsoever you're a better person than I am. These guys are in the habit of reinventing themselves and they're damned good at it. I love Metal and I think Ulver's first three records are great, but comparing those to 2005's Blood Inside or pretty much anything they've released since 1998 is basically impossible. Intriguing and quite possibly insane, which makes them perfect for our needs, doesn't it?

Aliens Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
Composed and Conducted by James Horner

James Horner and the London Symphony Orchestra take on a sinister countenance. As much as I love synthesizers, samples and all things digital, there's a special place in my heart for orchestral scores. Maybe it's all those acoustic instruments ganging up into an improbably menacing wall of sound. Maybe it's the thought of violins and flutes showing their dark sides. Dynamically, Aliens has a lot of quiet moments, making it perhaps a little more appropriate for more intimate environs. Still, the brooding and desolate mood is well-suited to the spirit of the evening.

In the third and final installment I'll cover the best of the rest: a list of one-offs and honorable mentions. Meanwhile, if you like what you've seen so far or if you have some suggestions that I haven't mentioned yet, please do leave a comment. I'm all ears.

Horrifying Sounds, Part I of III

To all fellow lovers of Halloween and horror I offer the first installment of a three part rundown of my all-time favorites in dark music.

Prince of Darkness Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
by John Carpenter and Alan Howarth

Not only is this my favorite horror soundtrack of all time, Prince of Darkness also happens to be one of my favorite horror movies of all time. I'm a huge fan of John Carpenter, particularly his work in the eighties. While not nearly as well known as Carpenter's famous score for the horror classic Halloween, Prince of Darkness represents the distinctive Carpenter style at its very best, using layered synthesizers to paint a desolate, apocalyptic landscape with moments of unrelenting dramatic tension.

The CD is a bit pricey since it's currently only available in a German import version but it's worth every penny and has become a regular fixture in my Halloween celebration.

Alien 3 Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
by Elliot Goldenthal

Film score legend Elliot Goldenthal's foreboding and dizzying score stole a scene or two from Giger's famous monster in the flawed but endearing third installment of the Alien series. The music is percussive, sinister and leaves the impression of every instrument being pushed violently toward its limits. Goldenthal skillfully weaves together orchestral, choral and electronic sounds to create a work that is, in some ways, as eccentric as the film itself. It moves suddenly from grim, depressing soundscape to haunting, poetic melody and then plunges savagely into vicious caricatures of the alien creature. Yet, whereas the film's eccentricities were widely regarded as weaknesses, the score works beautifully and stands well on its own.

In the next installment, I'll be talking about a few more of my favorites, including some scores by Ennio Morricone, James Horner, Ulver and a few more from John Carpenter.

"There's something in the woods..."

"The branches just started twisting themselves together..."


"...then it reached for me..."

The King's Creep Factor Soars to New Heights

Wake up! I have something I want to show you!



Not that we needed it, but today's lunch provided more damning evidence that Burger King is moving fast to expand its campaign of creepiness beyond the now infamous, iconic weirdo "The King".

My friend Erik found this in his chicken fries today:


Wait, here's another angle:



I can hear the tagline now: "Eat a dick, America! Eat a whole box of them!" [Cue: The King, with his shellacked and unnerving smile, presents a box of piping-hot, phallic chicken snacks.]

Mom, if you're reading this, I'm sorry. I don't like sharing this kind of news but the public has a right to know.

The Truth Is Still Out There

My name is Jon Glassett and I am a skeptic.

In the past I've been guilty of some amazing feats of magical thinking. At one time or another I've bought into everything from tarot cards to astral projection. Hell, I even bought a book about the latter and actually tried to induce it. For several years. No kidding.

I've been to psychics when my heart was broken, read my horoscope faithfully looking for solutions to problems, watched the skies in hopes of seeing a UFO, looked and listened for ghosts, burned candles, worn talismans, interpreted dreams for spirit visitations and messages, read all about chi (and tried the exercises), looked for (and found! Boy, did I ever...) "signs" while out on late night walks, made wishes on meteorites and on and on and on.

Wanna know how much of it panned out?

Zero.

Fucking. Zilch.

Know why?

Because IT'S ALL A BUNCH OF CRAP.

Self-deception, desperation, loneliness, stupidity, naïveté, gullibility, fear, boredom: call it whatever you want but these are the only sources of "power" from which any of the above things can draw. The vulnerability or the willingness of the individual to be deceived. The limitations of human perception and understanding. The mind's incredible ability to fill in the blanks when comprehension falls short.

So is the world any less wondrous a place for me? Hell, no. The mysteries still abound. The questions still far outnumber the answers. There's still so much that is undiscovered and maybe even undiscoverable. The difference now is that I'm not content with superstition. I can accept that some things can't be explained (for now) but I'm unwilling to accept a surrogate explanation which cannot be supported with real evidence.

I want answers.